Rave and Rant

"I imagine that one day I will have children. I also imagine that I'll be a super hip dad who's still on top of the music and art house film scene. My kids will envy my vinyl collection and hate me for going to sold out shows that they couldn't get tickets for or afford. I'm not going to turn into an old crusty parent who doesn't understand "the kids of today". I'm going to age gracefully."

This was my plan for the future and it seemed completely feasible, but then I found out, that at the age of 26, I'm already out of touch. My dreams of being super cool dad went down the toilet at a rave.

Now to clarify, if someone asked me "Do you want to go to a rave?" I wouldn't even need a second to think about my answer, which would be an emphatic "No!" So how did I end up at a rave? Easy. You call this "rave" a festival, and you advertise that The Roots, Reflection Eternal, and Chromeo are all performing. I've seen The Roots live more than any other artist and tend to catch them whenever I can.

So this festival is called Audiotistic, and I did know beforehand that it was considered a rave, but I figured that if we stayed in the hip-hop room (which was actually an outdoor stage, which was a pleasant surprise), we wouldn't really have to deal with the raver kids. Not that I expected any trouble from anyone, I'm just not part of the scene. The could enjoy their techno and glow sticks, and I could enjoy The Roots.

So my friend Beverly and I arrived in San Bernardino and saw a flock of people heading toward the venue. Some of the kids were dressed pretty normally (for going to a concert) and then there were some kids, who were dressed a little more festively, which is a gross understatement. I thought I kind of knew what to expect wardrobe wise from these raver kids. Bright colored clothing, perhaps some colorful jewelry, (you know, things that I wear on an daily basis). To my surprise, ravers these days (guys and girls) prefer to wear as little clothing as possible, except for their boots with the fur (minus the apple bottom jeans).

To be more specific, girls would show up in bikinis, with huge pink furry boots, and Hello Kitty backpacks, along with the aforementioned glow sticks and jewelry. Guys, likewise, would show up in nothing but speedos, backpacks, but without boots. Now, I've never been to a rave before, but I've been told this new wardrobe ensemble is a fairly new thing to rave culture. These people looked young, like in the 16-20 year old range, so it wasn't exciting for me to see these scantily clad girls prancing around, it just made me feel creepy and dirty.  Obviously these kids didn't leave the house looking like that, or least I hope not.  No sane parent would be okay with their kid dressing like that and heading out to the boonies for a "concert", right?

The fact that I'm thinking about this has shown me the reality that I've already become the old parent that I thought I'd never become, and I don't even have kids yet.  I thought by going out to this festival that I'd show everyone that I'm still young and hip, but when I returned, I realized that I'm quickly becoming an old man.